Saturday, September 11, 2010

Karnataka History Part -1: Revenge of The Brahmin

The southern state, that looks like a bean is Karnataka. Where I come from. Usually, to the folks up north, every south Indian is Madrasi, or Mallu. That sucks. Thus, I'd like to present here some stories of the past from this region:

The political history of Karnataka starts with the rise of the first indigenous dynasty: The Kadambas. Untill then, this land was under the control of The Pallavas, who used to rule from Kanchi, in Tamil Nadu. They were already doing some pretty awesome things, like the shore temple, and the Mahabalipuram cave temples and all that Jazz. We had nothing yet.

Enter: Mr Mayurasharma. From a small town called Banavasi. He was just another Brahmin boy playing around, reciting what he was taught and so on. Now you see, brahmins are stereotypically weak and vegetarian. Not the sorts that would go picking a fight. Like so:
Wouldn't harm a fly...
After obtaining excellent GRE scores, he went off Kanchi for higher studies.


And then, the inevitable happened. The city folks couldn't resist picking on the small-town brahmin.

Ofcourse, this was about two thousand years before we learnt that ragging seniors could be dealt with by electrocuting their cojones. Therefore, what happened next was Old school.
Retribution Time!!
Mayursaharma swore vengeance on not only the idiots who Punked him, but against the whole frikkin empire. Eye-witnesses say he said something like: "The hand that clutches the sacred grass can wield the sword too" before storming back to his town.

He bandied together a few of his friends, and in a slow flashback scene, with soulful music, mastered the martial arts. Guerrilla to be precise. The rampage started in the forest areas of modern day Srisailam in Andhra Pradesh. He grew stronger and stronger and when the dust finally settled, his army had inflicted some severe ass kicking on Traikutas, Abhiras, Sendrakas, Pallavas, Pariyathrakas, Shakasthana, the Maukharis and Punnatas: all kingdoms in the south and became Emperor
They even made a movie...
 One of the first things he did after he became king (apart from the diamonds and the red tights) is that bounced out Prakrit and made Kannada the official language. From then on, Karnataka became an independent geo-political entity and a centre of power.

They even named India's most advanced and only military naval base INS Kadamba. 'Nuff said.